"Did you fight Paul when he married number three?" Renee asked.
"That was different. Paul would have killed me. He is not civilized like Ngoni," Rudo protested.
"Obviously Ngoni is not that civilized. He is getting a wife without divorcing his first," Renee said.
"You want to be divorced?" Rudo gasped. Divorce had never entered her mind. "What would that achieve but disgrace for you? Please, don't even think about that. You and your children will suffer. It is better to stay married. At least you will be the first wife. Paul respects number one more than the rest of us. Divorce is hard. A divorced woman goes through too much. Don't even think about it."
"Rudo, I have to go." Renee cut her off. "I truly have to go. I will call you okay?"
"Okay," Rudo was deflated.
Rudo stared at her cell phone for several seconds after her cousin had hung up. She felt old all of a sudden, disjointed. She frowned intensely at the phone in her hand as she tried to order her thoughts.
That auntie was damn right as usual. Ngoni was getting himself a younger and much prettier wife. She'd never thought that would happen, even when the old hag had been predicting it.
Pamela. Of all people, that high class girl with wealthy parents had succumbed to the hateful position of second wife. Was she crazy? She was surely the biggest idiot God ever created. She herself would never have married Paul had her father been rich. Life was funny. It had a way of equalizing all women.
She remembered Pamela and her high class friends attending some of Renee's functions. How she envied them, especially the one married to the white man. She would look at her and wish she was the one living with the white man. Surely being married to a white man was better than being married to Paul.
How she had wished she was part of Pamela's crowd. They drove cars, dressed well, went overseas and didn't have to sleep with men to pay for it.
Come to think of it, Pamela did kind of look like a Coloured. She had that crazy silky hair, that nose and those violet eyes. The thing was though, her complexion wasn't quite up to the Coloured standard, but she could be Coloured. Her father could have been the Coloured. Perhaps he was. What did Rudo know about her father? Nothing.
She flopped on the bed, finally releasing the tension. Not in her wildest dreams had she ever believed that Ngoni would marry another woman. He and Renee seemed so perfect. They had the picture book marriage that Rudo had always wanted. And then he went off and had this thing with Pamela. Rudo was no fool when it came to me. She knew that Ngoni must be deeply in love with Pamela to give up his dignity in society. He'd always seemed so cold to her. Not her type at all, but so commanding of respect that she actually gave it to him.
And then again, Renee deserved it. No one in this world deserved to have everything they wanted. Renee was born with a silver spoon in her mouth and she, Rudo had to eat her leftovers. Renee had had the big wedding and the big Borrowdale house, while Rudo had barely made it into the wives' club. Renee went on holidays overseas while Renee stayed home and ran a hairdressing salon.
Renee's time was up to also feel the cold, cold world. She deserved it. When Rudo thought of it like that, she no longer felt sorry for Renee. To every woman some rain must fall and her cousin had had it too good for too long.
Rudo groaned out loud. She was being mean. Renee had been nothing but kind and loving to her, ever since they were children.
"Mommy, are you hurt?" Chiedza asked, her face riddled with red lipstick and concern. She'd stopped twirling her mother's beads which she'd wrapped around her neck.
"No, mommy is thinking, that is all," Rudo smiled at her only child, knowing with a certainty that she will never be in a polygamous union.
RENEE.
Renee could not breathe! She heaved instead as pain, anguish and anger battled to take control of her. Hands shaking she picked up her cell phone and dialed Ngoni's number.
He picked up promptly.
"I need you to come home so that we can talk," she began, fighting for control.
"Talk about what?" he asked, even though he was already on guard.
"Ngoni, I am not going to do this over the phone. It is not the way things are done. I am asking you as your wife to come home and talk to me." Renee wanted to howl to the moon. She wanted to kill herself. Blow her brains out, tie a rope to the ceiling and hang herself, drop herself off the second floor of their mansion, anything at all. Dear Lord, it was better than suffering like this. Death was better than facing a future where her marriage disappeared and she lost everything. She couldn't lose everything. Her marriage was what held this life together. She couldn't do this to her daughters. Oh my God, if only she had produced a son for her girls, a son to keep her girls' future safe.
She breathed in again as tears flooded down her cheeks. She had to be strong. She'd never had to be strong before, but somehow, she had to find the strength. She had to be calm so that Ngoni would hear her out. He had to understand that what he was doing was detrimental to everyone.
"I am asking you to come home," she repeated quietly. It would not do to lose everything to fits of grief and pain. "Will you please do that for me?"
There was a long silence at the end of the line. She could tell he didn't want to. It struck her that Ngoni worked long hours to avoid her. How had she not seen it before? He didn't want to be around her. And so he worked.
"Alright. I will be there within the hour," he promised.
"Thank you."
Renee sat on the bed and let the tears reign. The bed wasn't good enough and so she slid to the floor and howled like a dying dog. That wasn't enough, and so she stood up and ran around her bedroom. She gripped her middle as stupid memories took over. Her two daughters had been created in this room. It was in this room that she had a connection with Ngoni. It was in this room that Rudo had finished her marriage.
Who was going to help her now? No one from Ngoni's family cared whether he divorced her or not. Her mother would blame her. She would tell her that it was her fault, just as Rudo said. She couldn't talk to Rudo. She'd sensed the gloating coming from her cousin and she didn't deserve it.
Just as another wail threatened to come from the depths of her despair, she remembered her daughters. They couldn't hear this. She had to protect them, even if it was for just one more night.
Next issue: the confrontation between Renee and Ngoni.
And that is all for this week.....if you want to read the whole story then go and buy the book at **LULU**
In the Bedroom
